It is Sunday morning and already I have eaten an entire grapefruit. I have just enjoyed a hot espresso with a dab of fresh-pressed coconut oil and now I contemplate life: Calm in my wilderness with reverence, thinking life takes a commitment. It really does.
With the emergence of a new dawn, notwithstanding, we are awakened to a new birth everyday. We fight through the drudgery of yesterdays and where we require penitence, we atone to God and ourselves and then proceed on with living. Last evening, I found myself in a candy store, a remedy for all that ails me as I sampled delicious dark chocolates and purchased some addicting peanut brittle. As a child, I loved this crunchy sweet candy filled with peanuts. Often times when the past haunts me, I reach back to what was soothing from sometimes harrowing and searching days.
February was unusually cold this year and heartbreaking as a fundamental truth about me revealed an incredible silent fault, or failing… or rather meagerness. Yet, as I watched the sun rise today, the aura of spring lifted me into gratitude… wanting more, but grateful to have come this far. Snow is falling on this first day, a Sunday, of March. We know after the winter comes the season of spring… Longer, sunny days, the rain and fresh smell after the rain; jonquils, daffodils and lily of the valleys… an abundance of these hardy, many diminutive and beautiful flowers will soon begin to break through the cold earth. A microcosm of what we must do every day in life.
We break through the hard places to breathe deeper and pull in whatever we can extract from an impenetrable earth. We keep moving into Spring’s brilliance and its endless possibilities. We hold tight until the hardness releases. Then we dance to celebrate the culmination for life’s passion budding in a different soul from yester-years.
I am drinking water now, realizing the paradigm of spring flowers gripping my senses in this moment. The water quenches my thirst… as I contemplate Spring’s aura, the lightness within me shakes with anticipation, thriving to burst loose and live this season in a most profound way.
Sitting outside my TINYKITCHEN after a week of GREATTASTE in soups to help me feel better and feeding my BIGHEART for what is real in life… Including the tragic, silent
fault haunting me… A heart in rebellion now… Finding my way.